Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
