PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
