Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
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