Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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