I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
