So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize
