i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Duck Duck Cougar?
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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