white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
