I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Randomize
