I just saw a hot homeless man
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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