Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
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