I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
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