I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
