totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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