I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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