Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
