The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize