I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize