C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
