I wish i was in the wii world.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Shame - the story of my life.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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