I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman