ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."