hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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