i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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