My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
