no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
