Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I have post one night stand depression
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
