Your mouth is God's brothel.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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