it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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