The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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