She said her name was "party"
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
