You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
