I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
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