is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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