i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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