i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize