I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize