So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Randomize