I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
