I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Randomize