Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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