she was so not down for the gang bang
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
