I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"