Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Randomize