i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
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