her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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