Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize