My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Randomize
