But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
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a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
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I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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