The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
