Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
