after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Randomize
