I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize