so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize
